Racism and Mental Health on Campus
[ACTION REQUIRED] email sent to President Laurie Patton of Middlebury College on December 10th, 2021.
Dear President Laurie Patton,
I have attached a voice recording of me reciting this letter for the purpose of accessibility and emphasis.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/11Yg9-qa-UodvHhsPGLOWAxfVE8sdV99x/view?usp=sharing
I am a white student who has witnessed two crises in the last month. Both involved students of color with severe mental health issues. Their lives were in jeopardy. I am especially sensitive to this because this was my situation last year.
My family abandoned me and I became homeless and food-insecure during the Spring 2020 semester. I was speaking to my Student Life Dean, Financial Aid, my counselor, and my tutor; nobody could connect me to any adequate and material resources. I was unable to work, and I survived by making stimulus checks last me the whole year.
I had to crowdfund money from my fellow students just to pay for a flight back to campus that Fall. I was in no state to be doing schoolwork after the trauma I experienced, but I came back to Middlebury so that I could get food and a reliable place to stay.
I spoke with financial aid that entire semester, but because I could not prove my situation - because I couldn't prove what I lacked - they did not help me. Instead I had to attend multiple meetings and reply to countless emails, telling me that I had to work with my parents - who I couldn't speak to - or I could not return to school the next semester. The Financial Aid Office only gave me more stress during this ordeal.
I was loudly and clearly expressing my situation and how hopeless I felt to every adult who worked with me. I was only connected to the Wily Network, which provides coaching and financial help to Middlebury students without family support, because of a conversation my CTLR tutor had with a writing professor on my behalf. We began the process of me becoming a Wily Scholar, but I still had no tangible support. Two weeks after I was told the Wily Network exists, an ambulance drove to my dorm and took me to the hospital.
I know for a fact that had I been told about the Wily Network before, I would not have ended up in the hospital. If someone made sure that I had a home to go back to, and food during breaks, I would not have needed the emergency room. I don´t think that my chronic illness would have had such a violent, early onset if it weren't for all the stress that I was forced to deal with on my own.
I had to take a medical leave of absence. The college sent me straight home to South Carolina after I got out of the hospital, and I continued to be homeless and food-insecure. I petitioned to return in the Spring 2021 semester because going to school was my only surefire way of meeting those needs. I was denied, and I could not return until this fall. In order to return to Middlebury, Student Financial Services required me to accept a $13,000 loan, and write a letter detailing my trauma from parental abuse.
During one of the hardest times of my life, Middlebury has made it harder. I am just one other example of this school´s neglect of BIPOC, low-income, first-generation, undocumented, queer, trans, and disabled students.
We can't treat Middlebury like other schools. It's not like other schools. We have a location and culture that encourages depression, anxiety, isolation, and alienation.
The lack of sunlight in Vermont leaves us with a Vitamin D deficiency and, literally, a dark world. Symptoms of Vitamin D deficiency are depression, anxiety, fatigue, and a weak immune system. The environment is an enormous factor in the mental health of students. Spending almost all of our time on campus, and in a rural, freezing, aging Vermont town, takes a toll.
Students are constantly sacrificing food, sleep, social connections, and any downtime they may have for the sake of their academics. That may be "how it is" in college but it shouldn't be. This should not be normal. I cannot possibly be proud of a school that allows this to be normal.
The academic culture of Middlebury is intense and toxic for the mental health of students. The social culture is isolating. The environment and food are harmful to our health. These problems are felt exponentially by marginalized students, especially students of color.
Middlebury is a predominantly white institution; in and of itself that makes this a dangerous place for students of color. This college was not designed for them, let alone to protect their health. This school was made to preserve racial and generational wealth.
Poor students are held to the same, or higher standards as the rest of the college. This is a college where 76% of students come from the highest wealth bracket, and have the privilege of parents who can pay for their education, and a history of elite private schooling. Because some students have a tough life, they are expected to be more hard-working, diligent, and driven. You have to have those qualities in order to get here from their circumstances, but once students are on campus, they feel like they are not allowed to have flaws or deficiencies. Students don't have the space to. Middlebury makes students feel like they do not belong here.
For so many students, college is a lifeline. It is a way for them to come out of their circumstances and support their family and themselves. They see succeeding in school as their only path to safety, and that makes them even more reluctant to seek help or take time off. They don't have the privilege of many options.
There is a lack of BIPOC mentors, role models, actively supporting and building community. They need an adult culture to hold and receive them. Students and their peers are forced to handle the majority of their problems on their own, with little sensitivity to their trauma.
We have students who are afraid of being deported when they leave campus. Students feel fetishized by their professors and classmates due to their race. Students are stared at, and they are followed. Students of color do not feel like they can trust their classmates, professors, and sometimes even their advisors. Students and their safe places are targeted by Public Safety. They do not feel like they have allies on this campus. Students feel like they are walking on eggshells. Black students must carry themselves carefully at Middlebury so as not to upset a white student or faculty member.
This is unacceptable. I think, frankly, it's pitiful that there can be diversity initiatives at this school but no change to the campus culture or material resources given to these students. How can students be expected to learn anything when they don't feel safe?
We need to stop treating the causes of mental anguish like they are individual problems. Students can't just be treated on a case by case basis. These are patterns of violence that we call out in conversations and classrooms at this very school. Depression and the marginalization of BIPOC students are systemic. We must acknowledge this reality if we truly want to promote ¨diversity¨ at this school. Right now, diversity serves the white students. They have the privilege of getting to learn from students of color, who shouldn't have to educate their peers. White students have a more enriching education due to the presence of BIPOC, but students of color face a traumatizing college experience.
Middlebury is not doing enough. We need to think bigger. We cannot keep using the same strategies, and providing the same resources, for a student population with rapidly changing needs. If students are neglected, harmed, and marginalized, then this is a stain on the college. It is a failure. We need to improve how this school treats minorities, and a lot of that lies in taking care of them.
I was compelled to write this letter because my friend almost died Monday morning. He was in no state to control himself, and students had to form a tight group hug around him to prevent the police from touching him, and anyone from getting hurt. Without their protection and advocacy, my friend would have been gravely misunderstood and the situation could have escalated. I have had flashbacks everyday since this happened. He could have easily lost his life in that encounter.
A month ago, another friend of mine attempted suicide. If not for the fast action of students, I don't think either of them would be alive today. Both of these students are black men. Both of them were socially isolated and felt hopeless. Both of them lacked vital resources and adults who they felt comfortable turning to. Their near-death experiences could have been prevented if Middlebury met their needs.
The recent suicide on campus was not an isolated incident. Yan Zhou´s death is indicative of a widespread mental health problem at Middlebury.
It is crucial that we consider the following:
Expand the AFC/CCSRE, and create new resource centers to support marginalized identities. They should not all be consolidated into one building. There should be separate spaces designated for low-income students, first generation students, undocumented students, queer and trans students, students of color, and, specifically, black students. These spaces should not have to prove why they should be on campus. They are necessary. The AFC should not need a sign-in sheet to prove that students use the space and it should stay open.
Expand the Wily Network. Wily takes care of students without family support, but they are limited in their capacity. They can provide coaching and some financial support, but Wily will not directly fix students´ situations. International students have the option of being set up with a host family. There are domestic students who need host families too, but they do not have that option. Middlebury has more funding and power than the Wily Network, and the college should take it upon itself to support these students. Wily only has one coach hired here and they are unable to accept more students. There are just as many Wily Scholars on campus as there are students who should be Wily Scholars. There could be even more.
Hire more BIPOC counselors, faculty, and staff. Every person hired by Middlebury should be vetted and trained to make sure they are sensitive to race, culture, class, gender, disability, and identity. First Year students should also be required to complete mandatory sensitivity training focused on social justice before they can come to campus.
Expand mental health resources and make them readily available. We should at least double the amount of counselors we have in order to address the rising mental health issues in young people, especially during a pandemic. Same-day appointments should be full sessions. Telehealth and zoom appointments may be necessary during quarantine, but they fall short. In-person appointments should be prioritized, and students should be made aware that they are even an option. It is also vital that Middlebury hires at least one psychiatrist. We need a system to provide enough psychoeducational assessments to meet the needs of neurodivergent students.
Provide healthy and high quality meals to students. Nutrition is an essential component to promoting the mental health of students. Many students can't even look forward to their meals most days. They dread going to the dining halls, but it is the food that is most accessible. For many students, being able to eat while the dining halls are open is unrealistic. If the dining halls close before they can get there, students are forced to buy food at Midd Express or off-campus. This, in combination with our insufficient dining food, creates disordered eating and nutritional deficiency. Students need a free dining option that is available 24/7, or at least until midnight, like Midd Express.
Expand CTLR. Hiring more directors and tutors for Learning Resources is essential to the success of marginalized students, who often come from schools that did not adequately prepare them for college. Underachieving students should be noticed, and instead of being penalized, they should be connected with CTLR, writing tutors, STEM tutors, and any resources that meet needs that are impacting their school performance.
Expedite the review of Opportunity Grant applications. Students should not need someone to back up their story to prove that they need support. Their self-advocacy should be enough. Students should not have to wait for aid after the date they say they need it.
Guarantee Financial Aid to students for the full duration that it takes them to graduate from Middlebury. We need to accommodate students who take leaves, students with reduced course loads, and students who come from vulnerable communities with lower graduation rates.
Require that admissions work closely with Student Life Deans and staff to understand what resources are available to the students Middlebury admits. The college is admitting more students who require more support, without giving these students enough support. Middlebury´s neglect is setting these students up for failure. Getting diverse students here is not enough. You have to take care of them too.
Middlebury has the funds to make sweeping changes to protect its students. If you find that you are unwilling to make these changes, you need to be honest about what is being prioritized over their health and lives. Lip service is not enough. Small student and faculty-led initiatives are not enough. The administration of Middlebury needs to take proactive steps to meet students where they are.
To write this letter, I spoke with students and I got feedback from faculty and staff. I myself do not have very specific plans or grand ideas. I am just a student speaking for other students. In no way do I have the power or experience needed to address these problems. That is the college's responsibility.
Sincerely,
Lilo Sche